Jesus Is On Tinder And His Pickup Lines Are Miraculous

If you’re on Tinder religiously, you may have noticed that Jesus has indeed risen, just in time for Easter.

Yes, Jesus is looking for love. He’s even got a hilarious profile pic that shows him posing with Swedish fish and tortillas (fishes and loaves people!) and turning water into wine.

Other pertinent facts about this hunky son of God:

• He says he’s actually thousands of years old, adding “idk why it says 21 lol.”
• His one downside: “I’ve only been nailed once.”
• “Upside: I would die for you so you know I’m committed.”

All of this is well and good, but where Jesus really shines is in his direct messaging.

That’s what impressed Twitter user @QueenIdle most when she matched up with Jesus recently on Tinder.

She was impressed, but soon found out that Jesus has a loyal following. Take the following exchange with Twitter user @xhaley_nicolex, for example:

And he sure gets around:

Guess it’s tough being so virtuous all the time!

UPDATE: To learn the story about Tinder Jesus, read this follow-up story.