Forgetting Sonia Sotomayor

With her boyish good looks, J-Lo-esque back story (being born in Brooklyn, not having a ginourmous ass), and squeaky clean voting record, Sonia Sotomayor is America's new Hispanic sweetheart. Her triumph over obstacles ranging from the pedestrian to the inconvenient (growing up in the richest city in the world, attending law school, and having a disease the treatment of which was discovered more than 40 years ago), has created what will be a short lived coomb-bye-yaa with most of the major voting blocs in the country.

White people, as usual, are taking credit for this momentous nomination, congratulating themselves on what a great a job they did finally considering having a lone Latino representative on a body that should by population alone have enough Hispanic representation to form a Mariachi band by now. Republicans are expressing their indignation in the most respectful and muted of tones, which for them is about as close as you get to shining admiration. And Hispanics are lionizing Sotomayor in a fashion reminiscent of the heady days of Alberto "El Dirte" Gonzalez.

This lionization is not necessarily a good thing. Hispanamericans were smitten with their first serious political crush in Gonzalez as he flirted with the prospects of a long term relationship between all Hispanics and the public service. They were instead subjected to the political equivalent of a backseat quickie behind a 7-11, left with their panties around their ankles wondering what happened as Gonzalez mumbled something about calling them the next day while rushing out the door of the Justice Department. Now he won't even make eye contact when you run into him at the supermarket. Awkward!

Sotomayor, who seems like a pretty saucy little minx who I personally probably wouldn't turn down a little backseat frivolity with, could be headed for a similar fate. Expectations are high, if not higher than with Gonzo, and she too is in in the crosshairs of being a "first". In the same way that we have forgotten Clarence Thomas's pubic hair filled career other than being the first black man to be seated on the bench, her legacy will be that she was born hispanic, whether she has a fair and unbiased view to serve or not.

So, my little Latinos Americanos, try to forget Sonia Sotomayor for now, or at least temper your expectations so you are not disappointed again. Because when she inevitably throws down and is the deciding vote on a 5-4 split decision that you don't agree with, your ridiculously high expectations will be dropped like hot wax on a stripper's nipple, and it will be equally painful to watch. Instead, let your expectations flow like milk off a hooker's stomach, and wait till you get some representation that is not going to be judged on being "the first", but on their actual accomplishments. It will be well worth the wait. It should only take another 400 years.